Limited Edition.

Ok guys. I'm very sorry for my lack of consistent posting as of late. I'm sooo grateful to all of you who check in and read my blog, it's really cool to have this place to share the happs of life over here where it's not as easy (time difference) or cheap to connect in real life. I've got a number of ideas for new posts and no shortage of pictures so please persevere, keep checking in and I promise to be more diligent at setting aside time to write.

I guess part of the reason I haven't been writing is because I've been busy. Not the kind of busy I was before I moved here, the kind I needed so badly to get away from, but good busy. Busy getting to know the people around me, busy reading, busy playing my guitar, busy learning how to live and love, forgive and forget, dwell in good, in God, not in the past or in worry, doubt and fear. It's not all a walk in the park, as they say, but boy has this season been a huge breath of fresh air.

Randomly the other day the phrase "Limited Edition" came to mind and hasn't left. I don't really know where it came from, but it came. It got me to thinking about my time here in New Zealand. I'm only allowed to be here for a certain amount of time before I will be required to politely go back to where I came from. New Zealand is to me & I am to it similar to what one might consider Limited Edition. I, of course, knew from the beginning how long I would be here. I knew when the beginning would begin and when the ending would end (thanks to my e-visa!)...but I didn't consider the middle. I didn't know what would happen in the middle. Turns out it's amazing & as time unfolds is proving to be one of the most defining years of my life. So much provision and preparation for time to come, depth and meaning, awareness and understanding. It's not overwhelming. It's consistent and freeing. My foundation, which is my Faith in God, is solidifying. It's stronger. When you have a strong foundation you can build upon it with quality, sturdy, lasting materials. While my heart will undoubtedly break when it's time to say goodbye to my limited bit of time in New Zealand, with what I've received I pray I'll be able to walk humbly forward & GIVE.

Life Lessons...Part 1

I've been learning a lot since being over here.

I know, you're thinking "Yeah right...look at all of those beach pictures, she just lounges around in the sun all day." I AM enjoying the beautiful surroundings I'm so very lucky to have at my doorstep this year...

But it's true I actually, really have been learning a lot.

I've realized how important it is for me to write. Even when I don't feel like it or don't think I have anything to write about. Because every time I sit down with a cup of coffee, my latest i-tunes purchase humming through my ipod and my journal I learn something.

One thing I've learned since being over here, away from home, with waaaay less distraction and waaaay more time to actually think is that I am constantly living in the future. I'm always thinking 10 steps ahead...never noticing what's right in front of me. I'm not going to lie, it's been a disheartening realization because I can recollect many moments, friendships, experiences I've unintentionally missed out on due to my own lack of understanding. Understanding that life happens whether or not we pay attention. People come and people go, opportunities come and opportunities go, seconds-minutes-hours-days all come and go. What we do with these things is up to us. For me, having spent the better part of the last year or so thinking about and wondering "what's next? where? how? when? what if?" has been exhausting to say the least. But more than that it's gotten me nowhere real fast & for the first time in my 25 years I'm looking back with regret. Regret that I missed out on fully grasping and experiencing a lot of really cool moments because I was stuck in the future.

I am, however, grateful for this lovely little slice of a life lesson. That I'm learning it at almost 25 instead of almost 50. One thing I've been getting asked more and more over here & by some friends back home is "What do you think you'll do when you get back?" I do have a few ideas of what I might like to do...BUT I now answer like this..."Well, I have 7 months left here. A lot can happen in the next 7 months to change any ideas I might have, so I'm just taking it one day at a time and we'll see what happens." :) It's been really freeing to let go of 'What will be' and focus on 'What is'.

Love,

Rachel